*.::Tales of MY Life::.* [entries|friends|calendar] ...a collection of my pain... [ website | ...::My Space::... ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

New and untitled... [20 Dec 2007|12:23am] [ mood | busy ] As that beautiful voice said, “I cannot leave here I cannot stay” she thought of her mind. That restless mechanism, the deafening horrible sound. Sound of a treacherous storm awaiting to destroy anything and everything in its path. Once before, a lullaby played behind the gentle sound of the waves crashing against the soft edge of her eyes. The sun shined so brightly, across the ocean of her unscathed heart. The reflecting specks glistened with her smile. Now, she closes her eyes hearing abysmal screams kissing the crux of her aching mind. The sky overflowed in black slowly killing the stars, sending them far down into an abyss never to be found. ITS NOT FINISHED! Kiss Me

i feel its not finished [11 Dec 2007|11:09am] [ mood | blah ] i saw you somewhere in my mind last night. You were providing me the warmth that i need i remember telling you not to move and if you did, even an inch, i would feel the coldness creeping up at me There I sat.. feeling your touch Those hands, the warmth radiating thru my clothes allowing me to feel once again Feel that smile on my face Once again I was happy Kiss Me

Bury Me [06 Dec 2007|10:39pm] [ mood | cranky ] Bury me Just like the rest have Shatter my hopes Cut off my beat, battered wings Shoot the arrow Make my heart glisten with death Puncture me and take my last breath Might as well do it now Stop hiding, I’m still here Make it quick I’m tired Worn out from these wars in my head I don’t want to fight any longer Never will i fly and kiss the stars Never will i float away into bliss I promised to me i would carry on I would try again, but too many times I’ve failed There’s nothing left to do Bury me Kiss Me

I HAVE RETURNED [06 Dec 2007|10:31pm] [ mood | indescribable ] WOW IT HAS BEEN SO LONG THAT I HAVE UPDATED THIS.... I GUESS I JUST FORGOT ABOUT IT. I WILL TRY AND KEEP UP WITH IT AS MUCH AS I CAN... Kiss Me

memories [27 Oct 2006|03:34pm] Imagine.. No memories No past, solely present and future Could it mean no anguish? Erase from disenchanted mind The good olden memory Into thin air, should it never return Save the tears from shedding As memory befalls Wishing it still be unfeigned Imagine.. Memories No future, solely past and present Could it mean anguish? Remember and retain in mind The good olden memory Inside gyrating again and again Tears shedding As merely a memory Wishing it still be unfeigned WRITTEN EARLY THIS MORNING 10/27/06 1 hit X Kiss Me

Day by Day [27 Oct 2006|07:23am] Taking day by day, welcoming every breath Flying along, torn, wounded wings Kissing life in the eye Desiccated, rough slit lips, bleeding Words so innocent, said, erased Hated, but loved to hate Breathe today, unwillingly, but with hope Good intentions, stabbed, cut into pieces Broken promises, fallen tears, stinging lips Flying along, losing control, soon to crash Colliding with life’s smile, evil grin, abhorrence Kiss Me

Black Butterfly [27 Oct 2006|07:19am] Cool misted breeze hits my face Thunder roars over my head I walk head dropped down on a unknown road A face reflects off the murky puddle This face of which I had never seen in the past Or had I? Was it a figment of my never ending dreams? Could it possibly be my mirror’s reflection Black butterfly, crimson love patches on your wings Distract me of my thunderous thoughts Make the storm waste away Take me under your wing Fly through the clouds Rise above incandescent stars Lay me upon your heartbeat And kiss me goodnight Kiss Me

[02 Mar 2006|12:00pm] Seasonal Wars Just like tear drops trailing down frowning cheeks Day by day she feels cold and heartless How is it that some one could regain trust If all it has turned into is a seasonal war The sun fights, even burns, trying to dry up the rain Just when you think the battle is over The rain pours down and clouds the sun Makes it hide away its bright and happy rays of warmth For days the cold and soggy last Until the sun decides to give in again, try and shine one more time Then comes the chilling rude awakening Once again the cold overpowers warmth and turns it away Now icicles run down her face tearing at once smiling cheeks Heart in hand, under attack, struggling, still burning Written date: Feb 2006 Kiss Me

[02 Mar 2006|11:56am] Smile Smile on my face Smile so fake Torn into a million pieces All lost in this madness Hurting so intensely everything seems empty A breed of fake that aches Pretending to be alright feeling so dead inside Attempting to gather the pieces Longing to sew myself as one Transpire like before… Smile on my face Smile so candid Written date: unknown Kiss Me

[01 Sep 2005|02:23am] [ mood | confused ] HOW DOES IT FEEL? How does it feel when your addiction is taken away? Do you feel adrift and weary and not meaning the things you say? Does it make you feel frustrated and angry but miserable at the same time? Do you seek for help and tranquility and all they say is “its going to be fine”? Does it make you feel like everything is not worth living anymore? Do you attempt to take it back into your hands but its not like before? Does the torture of not having it make you want to take it all in? Do you prefer to overdose and die happy than never having it again? How does it feel when my addiction is taken away? written in july sometime Kiss Me

[01 Sep 2005|02:21am] [ mood | sad ] All She Wanted All she wanted in life was to be happy All was well then she grew up She started to experience new things She found herself wondering when things went bad Her days turned from being happy to being sad All she wanted in life was to make her dreams come true All was ok then her goals disappeared into thin air She could not find herself no matter how hard she'd look She then fell in love and found a piece that was missing Her life seemed to get better and found motivation All she wanted in life was to be loved All was better then she lost that piece and her heart broke She thought she could survive but she was wrong She now hurts intensely, confused and lost Her thoughts seem to torture her and never go away All she wanted in life was to feel alive written july 30, 2005 Kiss Me

[01 Sep 2005|02:20am] [ mood | depressed ] one and all Hiding behind those eyes lies fear and desolation No one knows its there eating away at vivacity No one bothers to look deep behind those eyes Hiding behind that gaze, lies a river of tears One and all, see the laughter and amusement A mask that is put on for the sake of sanity A mask which veils true emotion and ache One and all, see a mask on one another No one can escape this morbid reality Hiding away deep within trying to ignore the damage Hiding away hoping for a bright tomorrow No one knows the intensity of the anguish in others One and all, we still breathe written in august.. Kiss Me

[01 Sep 2005|02:16am] My Room Four of them they stand black and red, at the top they land they swirl up into artificial light lonely as ever they look tonight sitting in this corner staring away screaming so silently that no one understands what i say artificial wind drying my tears hoping with this wind, away will fly my fears now i lay, so i can walk in my dreams run in my night mares and forget all that it seems written sometime in august Kiss Me

[04 Aug 2005|09:52pm] [ mood | confused ] One Tear After The Other one tear after the other i cry for you what i dont understand is why these things you do one tear after the other i cry now you hurt me again some how one tear after the other i cry with pain i cant see how you can be so vain one tear after the other i cry out my feelings for you im starting to doubt one tear after the other i cry within my heart what you do is tearing me apart written a few days ago Kiss Me

[13 Jul 2005|12:32am] [ mood | bored ] Reminds Me Such happiness the day you asked me to be with you What I didn’t realize was, it was all to good to be true Now I sit here watching the candle light flicker on Reminds me of us, one moment bright as the sun Next moment I find myself hoping the fire doesn’t die The wax pours over the brim just like my tears when I cry I see this candle turn into many shapes and bleed out with pain Reminds me of me and my thoughts that are making me insane I wish these thoughts of your negligence were gone Now the fire no longer flickers but burns with great fury and determination to go on Soon the walls melt down and nothing matters, not even the words we said The wick has vanished and now the fire is dead written 7/12/05 Kiss Me

[10 Jul 2005|11:03pm] [ mood | thoughtful ] She She wanted him so bad But she never knew he would make her sad She gave everything she could Anything he said to do, she would For months she was there when in need Then one day, her thoughts she gave to him to read Things changed, she could feel it At last, things seemed to fit As time went on and on Her sanity she could no longer count upon She lost herself in his lies Now she awaits her demise The end of everything she has known She dies alone written today Kiss Me

[02 Jun 2005|02:22pm] [ mood | calm ] Wash Away Im to the point where i cant breathe without the ache of pain I look around i see the world watching everything My life has just begun to bloom inside its cage but now the rain comes pelting all my hope and dreams wash away all my tears and my pain wash away all my fear in this rain Why is it that i seem to be cursed to live a life in pain i find a love it falls away and i am left alone wash away all my love and my shame wash away all my tears once again written 6/1/05 Kiss Me

[30 May 2005|03:27pm] [ mood | thoughtful ] Waiting Waiting around for you Clinging to what little I hold Each day grows silver and cold What’s in my heart I try to construe I’m losing myself here waiting I’m sorry I cant be perfect Just like that, into me you wrecked You left a dent and left me there aching I tried to get up and go on But you came back around and I fell for you Others tried to get me up and help me too I refused their aid and now they are foregone I sit here alone on the road Thinking about which direction to walk Time is running out I cant help but stare at the clock Sometimes I feel like its going to explode And time will be up and gone Now I stand here waiting in confusion A stride closer to reaching a conclusion Waiting in the dark for that beautiful dawn written today Kiss Me

[19 May 2005|02:30pm] [ mood | confused ] Empty Separating myself from my dream Killing everything inside of me Draining it all out for you to see Out it pours with an unbearable scream No longer does anything subsist inside The agony I’ve felt for so long I’ve realized was all wrong From reality I can no longer hide I offered every part of my heart to you But you could not take a single piece You pushed away assuming it would cease What no one knows is you took it anew Again and again I kill everything within Heartless because of you, I try once more It never ends, when it does, my heart tore written today Kiss Me

[12 May 2005|11:54pm] [ mood | depressed ] Lost When I don’t have you here by my side I cry all my tears and feel empty inside I think I have lost you forever now Live on and be happy, I don’t remember how I have spoken my words and tried I tried to make you see that to you I’ve never lied All my feelings and actions only showed That for you my love I bestowed But you reject it all And end up hurting me after all I’m only happy for that moment you give me You I no longer will have that, lost that too The day I spoke my words and tried Was the day everything inside of me died I will await the day you come back to me But that day will never come, you are free I am nothing to you I am nothing in this world In this world that is dark and cold written today Kiss Me

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